Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
