Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
you inspire me to be a worse person
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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