sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
is that a dick in a sweater?
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
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