just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Randomize
