Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
Randomize
