So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
