oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
