if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I think your dad took our porno
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
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