Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
