ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize