Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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