So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
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