Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize
