Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Randomize
