i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Randomize
