Midget sex pt 2 tonight
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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