hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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