Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
