brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
