Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
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