It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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