There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I feel like a drive thru vagina
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
