Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
This is classic penis vs brain.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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