Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
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