Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
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