Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
