Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Randomize
