So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Randomize