I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
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