so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize