I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
