would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
What did we do last night that was yellow?
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
