Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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