btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Randomize
