Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
Randomize
