There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize
