There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Randomize
