I'm drive I can fine osifer
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
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