She's JV to your varsity
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
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