if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
Randomize
