Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
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