singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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