She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Randomize