yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
