Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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