I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
You left your phone here
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