don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize
