Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
