you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
