My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
