areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
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