"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
A+ Viking dick
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
